One and Only

Seriously, I am an adult (or at least I am attempting to be one) and THIS is not suppose to be a something an adult deals with. Adolescents….. sure. Teenagers….. Absolutetly. Even the occasional College student must face up to this experience. But Adults? NO!

What do you think you are doing Bac(k)ne? Yes, it is true. I am and adult dealing with the ever real and ever humiliating fact that I have ACNE on my back. What is even more embarrassing is how I have handled it! About two months ago when I started getting red spots on my back I thought it was just the occasional successful pimple attempting to torment me. When they began to take over and start a war with all the moles on my back I began to PANICK. This is not acne?!? This is a rash… or an infection I caught from those sick kiddos that come to my clinic. A nurse in denial! I scheduled a dermatologist appointment ASAP to prevent this RASH from getting worse.

At my appointment I told the Doctor how I have maybe a strep of staph infection on my back.“You are not going to believe how bad this infection is!” I stressed to him just sure he would agree. He took one look and asked how long I have been dealing with the ACNE on my back!!!!!

These guys are not friendly either. They itch and they hurt! I had encounters with pimples in high school but my heart now has more compassion for my fellow acne sufferers of the world. I was prescribed different washes and creams and the battle continues to rage on unsuccessfully.

The winner of most of the war so far is insecurity! It simply amazes me how this seemingly insignificant flaw can drain gallons of my confidence fuel. The last two weeks I have been driving on E! And poor Jon has had to basically carry me to keep me going. J

Then today, while cleaning out the prius, I found an old CD I had bought with Amanda and Tyler in high school. This is cheesy stuff folks, but I found a really silly WONDERFUL song that helped pick me up a little today the same way it did when I was 16.

Sometimes I have good days and it's good to be me
Sometimes I get the best of insecurity
And it's quite alright to be the one and only
But today I feel like the one and lonely

It's not that I don't know beauty is only skin deep
Just the skin I'm in, not the girl within
But one imperfection takes away my grin
Not that I think I'm ugly but
Acne throws me for a backslide
I won't go outside
Makeup can't hide how I feel inside
Some days it's hard to be a one girl revolution