The chapter: Recurring Loss

Blogging about infertility can mean, from time to time, the less jovial post.

This last month we drifted out of the waters of infertility and into the vast ocean of recurring loss.

Infertility can keep you wearingly treading to keep your chin above the waters of insecurity.

 Recurring Loss simply drowns you in grief. 

Infertility is struggle to get pregnant, recurring loss is the struggle to stay pregnant.

Many ask if it hurts less with a child at home or does it hurt less with each time. (These are legitimate questions- I like and understand why you ask- always ask rather than assume).

After hearing the news of the loss, I got to go home a see a family that remains precious AS IS. Any further additions will be welcomed with joy and praise and still my heart is currently complete with my spectacular family of three. I am so overwhelmed with thankfulness for Little Man that I do not as quickly feel forgotten my God as I did times before. He brought together a beautiful family. He redeemed my broken body by using it to guide us on a journey to meet the most incredible little boy- and in his grace I got to take this little boy home and call him MINE. This journey led my Hubs and I to place our worth and identity in God alone. A lesson difficult but amazing to learn. That said……..

"Does it hurt less with little man home?"

I smile a little and lie a little. The real answer seems too harsh to say out loud.

"Yeah, it hurts less."

But the truth is…..

One day there is a heart beating inside you. The next day that life is gone.

One day hope pulsates within of you. The next day that hope is gone.

Not a lot makes that hurt less, maybe just hurts differently.

For those who keep trying to conceive (Or have conceived) after recurring loss, what are ways you stay encouraged to keep trying? What resources, books, songs or scriptures keep you uplifted?

Would you consider sharing your story as a resource for those just starting this new chapter of our story?